The Hardness of God

C. S. Lewis, fairly soon after his conversion to Christianity, stated that "the hardness of God is kinder than the softness of men, and his compulsion is our liberation."

I had to meditate on that for awhile before I was finally able to grasp it. But I have found it to be so true in my own life. The same God who pursues us relentlessly nevertheless refuses to force us to himself.

Sometimes I find that his pursuit of me is so relentless, that I question how free my will truly is. Other times, his call to me is so gentle that I am almost scared by the freedom that I really do have to say "no." It seems like because of my rebellious nature, the mere fact of choice can often in and of itself turn into temptation.

Am I making sense? I'm finding these ideas hard to express because the only real sense I have of them is from personal experience. When I find better words, I'll post them. For now I'll just say this: I'm sure that God is not a tyrant in any sense of that word, nor does he just "let me be." In this regard, it's easy to describe what he doesn't do. As far as what he does do, I haven't quite found the words for it yet.

~Ken, Born of Fire