Destiny and Romance

There's a part of me, a part of my mind, or my heart, or my soul (or maybe all 3, I'm not sure), a part of me that was alive when I was younger. It's been dead, or at least sleeping, for the past few years. It is just now being awaken again.

When I was younger, I dreamed. I thought that there was some things in life that I was destined to do, that I could do whatever I set my heart on, that the passions that I felt in my soul would inevitably, unavoidably come to fulfillment in an awesome, world-changing way.

I also thought that one day I might find some dream girl, a "soulmate," if you will. A smart, funny, fun, exciting, beautiful young lady with sparkling eyes, whom I would gladly spend my life with.

Somehow, at some point, I started believing that such things were just childish fantasies, cultivated by fairy tales and movies meant to deceive us with false hope. I became convinced that most good decisions involved doing precisely the opposite of what my heart told me. Emotion = bad, reason = good.

But I'm changing. Again. Maybe, just maybe, there's good reasons why our hearts thirst for such things, why our souls respond to stories of destiny and romance.

I believe in free will, but I also believe in listening to one's heart. And our hearts, unfortunately, don't always let us choose what it wants. There are some things that God himself placed in our hearts, and he is trying to use our hearts to speak to us.

According to Scripture, there is a time and a season for everything under the sun. I believe that it's time for me to start following my heart.

Reflecting at 25

I'm 25 yrs. old now. That's a quarter of a century! It's funny because I'm in a position where some of my friends think that's fairly old and others think it's pretty young. I have very few "true peers" right now as far as age goes.

As I'm reflecting on my life right now, there's one word that comes to mind: uncertainty. Don't get me wrong; I'm not having some "quarter-life crisis" or anything, but I am wrestling with a number of things as far as where my life is headed.

One of the main things is marriage. For the past 4 or 5 years, I have enjoyed my singlehood a lot, and I've usually been fairly certain that I want to remain single for a while, but every now and then I waver a little bit. I've been doing quite a bit of wavering lately. As much as I really do enjoy being single, it's hard to ignore the fact that girls are stinkin' awesome.

Occupation-wise, I love what I'm doing right now, and I'm trying to stay focused on it, but at the same time I do need to be thinking about what I'm going to do next. I know the passions and gifts God has given me, but I haven't quite figured out what will be the best way to use them.

Above all, I am quite uncertain about where I'm headed spiritually. I'm kinda in the midst of switching churches right now after realizing that the church I've going to for the past 6 years doesn't at all fit with what I believe a church should be like. I'm also wrestling with my identity as a Christian and how I fit in with the "culture" of Christianity. There's so much about the Christian culture in America that I am ashamed to be associated with, but at the same time I know that God doesn't call anyone to be a loner and forge their own path. I certainly don't want to be unorthodox, but I am definitely questioning what exactly is entailed by orthodoxy.

Anywho, that's a summary of where I stand as I approach the big Two Five. I don't know if it sounds depressing or what, but I actually find it fairly exciting. I know that if I love and serve God with all my heart, mind, soul, and strength, he will ensure that my life will have meaning and fulfillment.

Love and Miracles

I've butted heads on several occasions recently with friends who have a somewhat different vision of spirituality than I do. Our discussions have caused me to wrestle with myself and what I really believe. Before I explain though, a disclaimer: the purpose of this blog is not to criticize my friends, but rather to talk about how these disagreements have challenged me and caused me to think more carefully about what I believe. Also, I don't express anything here that I have not (or would not) express in a face-to-face conversation.

These differences I've had with my friends involve the nature and purpose of miracles, spiritual gifts, signs, and wonders. I believe that God is all about the miraculous, and that he uses supernatural means to edify the church body, to display his power, and to express his love. I've heard countless stories. I've seen it. I've experienced it. Miraculous healing. Deliverance. Supernatural wisdom and knowledge. I don't at all dispute that God does this things and that he's wanting to do them more and more. I also believe that he wants us to desire and seek these things.

The problem then, at least as I perceive it, is that it often seems that people who really actively seek these things lose sight of what's ultimately important, i. e. "Love the Lord God with all your heart, mind, and strength, and love your neighbor as yourself." Love is our highest calling, and as we know from 1 Corinthians 13, spiritual gifts are meaningless with out love. Not that we should altogether forget about the supernatural aspects of our faith, but to me it would seem better to redirect the passion that people have for wanting to see miracles towards loving our neighbor. Perhaps if we did this, miracles would just be a natural outflow or result. Sometimes it seems like people just want to see God do cool little magic tricks just for the wonder of it.

I can see why this might be the case. A supernatural sign is much more tangible than an act of love. A miracle is more readily taken as a confirmation of faith than, say, someone washing another person's feet. I guess an act of subservient, selfless love is more explainable by natural means than a sick person being made suddenly well.

But even as I say such things, I'm wrestling with myself, wondering if there's some other motivation for the way I feel about these things. Miracles were obviously a very important part of Jesus's ministry, and they have been important to the church since the very beginning. Is this all just a lack of faith on my part? Or maybe I'm just clinging to a watered-down, unimposing, safe version of Christianity. Is it possible perhaps that while I claim to be all about the supernatural, I actually don't want to see those kinds of things happen out of fear for what they will bring about. I don't know. I think my motives here are at least somewhat good, but I have to consider the possibilities.

On the Tragic Incidents Involving Chris Benoit

Chris Benoit was one of my favorite wrestlers. Other than The Undertaker and Kurt Angle, there was no one else I enjoyed seeing in the ring more than Benoit. When I heard the news last night of the death of he and his wife and son, I was shocked and saddened. As I watched the WWE's tribute to him last night, I had no idea what the cause of the deaths were. My sadness only grew throughout the night as I watched his peers talk about how he was such a stand-up guy, one they could trust, and how he loved his son so much. My thoughts were that we truly lost one of the best, inside and outside the ring.

As I'm learning more details about the circumstances of the death, that in all likelihood Benoit murdered his wife and kid and then hung himself, I'm struggling with waning sympathy. The ironic thing is that this is all happening as I'm working on a sermon about refraining from judging people. No doubt what Benoit has done is terrible, and I wouldn't at all try to say it's okay. But it's important to remember in a situation like this that only God is fit to judge. Our knowledge is extremely limited, but God knows people's hearts. Let's leave judgment to Him. It's not our place.

There's a part in the Gospels where Jesus looks out over a huge crowd of people and it says he had compassion on them because to him they were "like sheep without a shepherd." There were probably some thieves in that crowd. Probably some adulterers, too, and maybe even some murderers. And Jesus knew. Just like the Samaritan woman at the well, he knew all about those people. But it did not invoke judgment, but rather compassion. Let us be more like Jesus. It's hard, I know, but condemnation helps no one.

Judgment and Fault-Bound Perception

I had written in a post several months ago about how every time we judge someone we are assuming a role that was never intended for us and belongs to God alone. I'm reading a book now that has been giving me even more insights into this topic. It's called Repenting of Religion: Turning from Judgment to the Love of God, and it's written by Gregory Boyd. To give credit where credit is due, a lot of what I will say here is inspired by this book.

One of the things that's extremely important to remember in considering Jesus's command to "Judge not" is the fault-bound nature of our own perception of things. It is extremely rare, if it ever happens at all, that the reality of something matches up 100 % with the way things appear to us. As Paul puts it in 1 Corinthians 13:12, "we see in a mirror dimly." At the time he wrote this, mirrors we're not clear glass like we have now. They were made of steel, and so the reflection was somewhat dark and distorted. According to Paul then, the way we see and understand things now is obscured. Even when it seems like we have enough evidence to have it all figured out, our eyes and our brains our imperfect, and we can never trust that we have the whole truth.

Unfortunately, it seems that we often make judgments even when we are not even close to knowing the full story. For one simple example, say you're eating in the mall, and a very obese man sits down at the table next to you. He weighs about 300 lbs., and he has a big, greasy supersized meal from McDonald's. You notice all of these things, and you think to yourself, with a bit of disdain, "Man, this guy needs to change his diet."

That is what you see, your perception. Potentially, this could be the reality: yes, he weighs 300 lbs., but 6 months ago he weighed 350 lbs. He's been keeping a strict diet and exercising regularly. Part of his diet is that once a month he gets to eat whatever he wants, and McDonald's is his favorite place to eat. You happened to catch him on the one day a month that he gets to indulge, and then you judged him based on that one, single encounter.

This is just one imaginary scenario of a type of thing that actually happens all the time. Constantly we (and I use we to include myself) judge people based on things that are really not our business in the first place. Even for people we know well, we usually don't know all of the various factors, circumstances, and motivations that influence their actions. The Bible is clear that only God can fully know the heart of a person, so not only is he the only one with the right to judge, he is the only one fit to judge. Who the heck are we? Who appointed us judges? Who told us that we get to separate the wheat from the chaff? It is my understanding that only God can do that.

If this subject challenges you and interests you, I strongly recommend Boyd's book. He goes much deeper on a topic that I just touch the surface of here.

Why the Blood Kid is My Hero.

If you haven't seen this video yet, watch it now. It's hiii-larious. (If you're reading this from facebook, I have the video in my posted items).

I've watched this clip many times now and laughed at it over and over again, especially when showing it to friends. But I've realized recently that in addition to the humor of it, there's something quite admirable about this kid. He sees the blood on his baby brother's lip, and in his little heart all he knows is that it's not right. Blood = bad. He cries out to his dad for justice--implicitly pleading with him to DO SOMETHING.

Of course, Dad knows it's not so bad, and thus the situation appears quite humorous to him. But for all Blood Kid knows, his brother is in great danger, and his dad's laughter appals him. "NOT FUNNY!" he screams, "NOT FUUU-NYYYY!" Despite the laughter, despite not being taken seriously, he stands up for what he believes is right, and against what he believes is wrong. He doesn't care what anyone else thinks of him.

It's a complete inversion of the Cain and Abel story; Blood Kid is his brother's keeper. When God confronts Cain about murdering Abel, he tells him, "Your brother's blood cries out to me from the ground" (Genesis 4:10). Cain tried to hide his actions from God, but he couldn't. Blood Kid, on the other hand, hides nothing. He himself cries out for his brother, emphatically and defiantly. Let us follow the way of Blood Kid and not Cain. Let us be our brother's keeper. When our brother is hurting, let us cry out to our Father: BLOOOOOD!

Friends XIV: Lane Trahan

I'm sitting in my recliner at the Chi Alpha house. It's 11:00 on a regular ol' weekday night, and school is in session. Class is at 8:00 am. I need to be in my office for 7:15 to do some last minute prep for class. I'm planning to set my alarm for 6. This means I'm already getting less sleep than I'd like, and every minute that I sit there on that recliner is even less. There's one reason why I don't get up and go to bed: Lane Ferdinand Nathanael Trahan.

I love just hangin' out with this guy because I know when we do I'm either going to laugh my butt off or have a good, meaningful conversation of the type that I can't have with most people without someone getting angry or tuning me out. Some of my fondest memories in the XA House are just sitting around with Lane watching funny videos on youtube (such as Frank Caliendo's John Madden Popcorn Popper commercial), or listening to Roll Out by Ludacris and laughing at the ludicrous lyrics.

One thing that's been really cool this past year is seeing Lane exercise his God-given leadership skills. It's been observed by many people that Lane has the ability to get people to do anything. If Lane says, "We should go shoot some pool at White Diamond tonight," chances are that White Diamond will be getting some pretty good business that night. In thepast few months, he has used this gift in spiritual matters as well, rallying people in order to deal with a pressing spiritual issue.

Whether through laughing, debating, or witnessing spiritual growth, getting to know Lane has been one of the best and most unexpected pleasures of my experiences in the Chi Alpha house.

In the Land of the Greeks, Part I

I'm not a fan of big cities. The noise, the traffic, the horns, the people--I usually find it all just a little too much to bear. But as I sit back and reflect on the amazing trip that I just returned from, I can honestly say that I miss being in Athens.

We were 11 students (okay, technically Amanda and I are both no longer students. Close enough), there for 11 days. We did some sight-seeing during a couple of those days (and definitely saw some breath-taking sights), but primarily we were there to spend our days at the University of Athens, talking to and making friends with the Greek students. The hospitality they showed to us far exceeded my expectations. We talked, sometimes for hours, while sipping down frappes in cafes. Some of us were invited to their homes. Some of the students even came to our place of lodging and allowed us to show them a true Cajun dish: red beans and rice. (Though we may have made it a little too spicy for them.)

We discovered that many, many of the Greek students are spiritually hungry. Conversations often very naturally turned towards church and God and Jesus, and students were frequently curious about our team and our purpose for being in Athens. It seems that a large number of the students are disappointed with the Orthodox Church but are, potentially, willing to take a second look at Jesus Christ.

The hospitality and spiritual hunger of the students are only a couple of the many reasons I miss Athens. I will discuss more in future posts. Yassas (Greek word for "hello" or "goodbye" plural).

~Ken, Born of Fire

Let's Get Real

I'm in the process right now of "taking ownership" of my faith/my religion/my walk with God/however you want to phrase it. Or maybe I should say that I'm letting God take ownership of it. Whatever the case, I'm certain that in the past, neither of us have owned it. You know who has? The preachers, the pastors, the authors, the mentors, the peers--pretty much everyone but God and me.

I'm by no means "rebelling" against the godly people in my life or anyone else. I thank God so much for the people that have reached out to me, befriended me, and discipled me. I'm just realizing that for the past few years, I've been doing a lot of assuming, accepting, believing and not enough questioning, rejecting, and doubting. I've been trying to fit into other people's moulds instead of creating one for myself.

I want to know who God is. Really, who is he? How much of what I think about God has simply been transmitted to me by others? How much have I discovered and known myself, by reading the Bible and really experiencing Him?

I know that God loves me. Or do I? Do I really? I know the that Bible says it's true, and that I've experienced his love, but I also know that this is what I've been taught for the last 6 1/2 years. So what's the real reason that I believe God loves me? Have I truly discovered it for myself? Or have I only accepted what I've been taught?

I've always thought these verses were cheesy:
Jesus loves me, this I know
Because the Bible tells me so.
But they're actually starting to mean something to me now.

When I first heard and read that "God so loved the world," it wasn't very surprising to me. It just seemed like a confirmation of what I had already figured was true. But I'm trying to "un-assume" things like that now. I want to let God teach me his love instead of presuming to have known it already.

~Born of Fire

Friends XIII: Kelsey Tomes

Kelsey Tomes, aka the Tomesinator. Her last name means "Voluminous Books," which is entirely fitting because if I could describe Ms. Tomes in one word, it would be "fun." I've never experienced a dull moment reading a big book, and I've never experienced a dull moment around Kelsey.

I think I've discovered one of the sources of her fun-ness: it's simply that she just jumps right in to whatever is going on at the moment. Let me explain with some examples:

A few years ago I got on this kick where I would just randomly tell someone, "Hey, do you remember that time when you punched me in the stomach and told me I was ugly and I can't read good?" Most people would just laugh, or say something like, "No, when did I do that!" Kelsey, on the other hand, would retort with something like, "Yeah, I remember that. And do you remember that time when you kicked me in the shins and told me I had dandruff and I smell funny."

Example 2: Another thing I had started doing recently was approaching friends when they were talking to someone else or a group of people and say something to the effect of, "Hey, So-and-So, I found that lice shampoo that you were looking for at Wal-Mart the other day. It's on aisle 5." Most people didn't quite know how to react to it, but the Tomesinator did. It eventually became a game of one-up-manship. The game culminated with Kelsey besting me, announcing on a microphone in a conference room in a hotel, in front of tons of people, that she had found my Preparation-H on the floor and needed to return it to me.

There are many other great things about this young lady; this is just the one I wanted to highlight. Kelsey Tomes truly lives in the moment, and seems to enjoy life in a way that makes everyone around enjoy it more, too. Thanks Kels.

~Ken, Born of Fire

Friends, Part XII: Stacey Labit

It's pretty much impossible to not like someone who makes you laugh, and Stacey has been making me laugh since almost the very first time I met her.

I have to admit, Stacey (or Stace, as many call her), took me off guard at first. When I moved into the Chi Alpha house this past summer, I knew all of the people who were going to be my housemates pretty well, but Stacey was the one unknown. I was pleasantly surprised, to say the least. Her willingness to speak her mind, and to vocalize whatever [crazy] thoughts might find themselves there, have almost made me fall out of my chair laughing on several occasions (and I mean that literally. That recliner in the xa house is a little unstable, and of some of Stacey's outbursts have sent me tipping backwards.)

Not that her humor is her only good quality. I've had numerous intelligent conversations with Stacey in which she said things that really challenged me and made me think. To this day, I still ponder a comment she made about morality, and how it's usually nothing more than a way for us to say we're better than someone else.

Long story short, Stacey has very quickly become one of my favorite people. Up until last summer, I only had big sisters. Now I'm very glad to have a little one, too!

~Ken, Born of Fire

A New Wave of Friends

I recently did Part XI in my ever-expanding Friends series, the subject of which was Josh Manning. As I was typing it up, I realized that over the past semester or two, I've made new friends and gotten closer to a whole butt-load of people. It'll probably take a while, but over the course of next few months, you will see blogs dedicated to the likes of:

Stacey Labit, Kelsey Tomes, Lane Trahan, Clint Larson, Bonnie Hippler, Ciji Taylor, Carly Guidry, Josh Higgins, Michele DeClouet, Janna Mahoney, and quite possibly a few more. I hope you'll enjoy them!

~Ken, Born of Fire

A New Wave of Friends

I recently did Part XI in my ever-expanding Friends series, the subject of which was Josh Manning. As I was typing it up, I realized that over the past semester or two, I've made new friends and gotten closer to a whole butt-load of people. It'll probably take a while, but over the course of next few months, you will see blogs dedicated to the likes of:

Stacey Labit, Kelsey Tomes, Lane Trahan, Clint Larson, Bonnie Hippler, Ciji Taylor, Carly Guidry, Josh Higgins, Michele DeClouet, Janna Mahoney, and quite possibly a few more. I hope you'll enjoy them!

~Ken, Born of Fire

Friends XI: Josh Manning

This installment of the Friends is about Josh Manning, aka the J-Mann, aka Big Sexy. Okay, I made up that last one. No one actually calls him that. Well, I can think of one person that might, but I don't know for sure. I usually include a picture in these things, but Blogger isn't letting me right now, so I'll add one later. Anywho, the J-Mann and I became friends when he was an intern with Chi Alpha here at UL during the 2005-2006 school year. If there's one thing I can say about him, it's that there is definitely only one Josh Manning. Well, actually, there are lots of Josh Mannings, and he's friends with all of them on Facebook, but I'm willing to bet that none of them are remotely like him.

Josh is the kind of guy that it's hard not to be friends with, even if you try not to. Not that I ever tried not to. I'm just saying, he's easy to befriend. In any given social context, it seems that Josh's number one priority is to make people laugh, and he has about a 50% success rate, which is pretty good. And when he does succeed, he REALLY succeeds. Though Josh was only here at UL for a year, and even though he's been gone now for almost a year, many of his jokes are still told to this today, and his legacy is kept alive by those who loved to laugh at them. Like the one where you take a saltshaker and a steak knife, and say "What's this? A salt with a deadly weapon!"

Josh is also a great man of God who is enlisted in active service in the Kingdom of God.

Finally, Josh also has a great, highly entertaining website, www.joshmanning.com, which you can check out for a peek into his life. Whether you know Josh or not, I'm pretty sure you'll be at least mildly amused by this site.

~Ken, Born of Fire

Canelope

I eloped this weekend.
I went away and didn't tell nobody.
It was just me and the air
me and the wind
me and you
everybody
anybody
me.

Cake, wrestling, God, money.
The Earth is my dowry.

And now I'm committed,
though divorce is an option.

Insight from the Ecosystem

What is the definition of community?

I was looking through a few dictionary entries, and the best one I could find is actually the ecological definition from the American Heritage Science Dictionary. It reads:

"A group of organisms or populations living and interacting with one another in a particular environment. The organisms in a community affect each other's abundance, distribution, and evolutionary adaptation."

That second sentence is what really strikes me.

Think about your community:

How much do you affect the other members?
How much do the other members affect you?

I think we can measure true community by looking at how consequential each individual's actions are to the rest of the members.

What do you think?

The Restful Student

As the amount of responsibilities I have mount and mount over the years, I have found rest to be an essential part of my life as a student. I mean essential in the most serious sense of the word. Without rest, I cannot function. And I don't think you can either. In case it's any help to you, here is how I try to stay rested (try being an important word here).

1. Daily rest is important. At least 7 hours of sleep a day is always my goal. When I don't, I feel it.

Besides sleep though, I also need rest in the daylight hours. Maybe a nap, but not usually. Just a point in the day where I can relax a little bit. These can take a number of forms: sitting down with a cup of coffee, talking to people in the cafe, reclining in the recliner, quiet time with God, walking around campus, facebooking, blogging, etc. What I'm doing isn't important, as long as it relaxes me.

2. Weekly rest is not only important but commanded by God. The whole Sabbath thing. I try to honor it. The key is to not get tripped up by days or times. Do it whenever you can. I usually stop working Fridays at noon and resume Saturday after lunch. During that 24 hr. period, I don't do any work. I'm also flexible though. If something comes up, I might shift the time a little bit.

And most of it's just relaxing: video games, TV, reading, hanging out with friends, whatever. But I also try to have some version of an extended quiet time during this period.

3. Beyond daily and weekly rest, an occassional extended rest is often vital. Luckily for me, as a student, the university takes care of this one for me. I just try to make the most of my holidays.

4. Lastly, I have what I guess you could call "Spirit-led rest." There are certain times that I'm just doing homework or something like that, and my mind will wander off into thinking about something I've been dealing with or thinking about lately. Usually this is just daydreaming, but occassionally I find that God is speaking to me about something or giving me some clarity about something I've been thinking about. At this point I'll stop whatever work I'm doing, if possible, and allow God to speak to me, and then I'll write about it in my journal or on a spare sheet of paper. If it's not possible for me to drop what I'm doing, I'll make some time later in the day to get alone and reflect.

Anywho, that's I how I rest, and thus how I keep my mind awake and productive. I hope it benefits you in some way. Sometimes I feel like we live in a world of sleepwalkers. Let's make sure that our work and routines don't lull us into such a state.

I just read a good article on relevantmagazine.com. It was about people leaving or switching churches and claiming they weren't "being fed." The author suggests that perhaps we're not fed because we don't pick up our fork and eat. The idea is that you can have a great meal set before you on a table, but if you don't pick up your fork and eat, the food is not going to jump into your mouth. Thus, the responsibility falls not just on the pastor et al to provide the food but also on us to be active in eating and digesting it.

I like the analogy. I think there's some truth in it. What do you think?

I would also like to extend the analogy by adding that if this is true, then our own studying of the Bible would be our spiritual Metamucil Crackers, so to speak. This gives new meaning to the idea of having a regular habit of reading God's Word.

Ah ha ha ha ha ha . . . no, but seriously, what do you think? Chew on that for a minute and let me know how it tastes. Peace.

Born of Fire

A Note I Received

I got an unexpected surprise today. I found an envelope with my name on it at the Chi Alpha house. I opened it and there was a little card inside. On the front it said:

Thank You

". . .he who refreshes others will himself be refreshed" (Proverbs 11:25, NIV).

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I opened the card and the inside read:

"The pleasantness of a friend springs from

their heartfelt advice" - Prov. 27:9

(You are loved)

Ken,

You are a great Man of God and true friend for everyone in the house. Your jokes, light humor, and kind presence always bring warmth and peace to a room. You are always ready to listen and offer advice . . . always thinking before you speak. You are a great teacher and allow God to use you to impact so many students' lives. You are appreciated more than you know!

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Wow. The reason something like this means so much is because we tend to be pretty critical of ourselves. Even when things are going relatively well, we often have this nagging sense that we could be doing better, that we're not meeting expectations, whether they be God's, someone else's, or our own. So to suddenly run into a note like this is just overwhelmingly comforting. It's nice to know that you may actually be doing something right.

Anywho, the point is, when you see someone doing something good, be sure to tell them. It makes a difference. A big one, as vast as the universe itself.

A Brief Encouragement

Peace. Peace be with you. May the peace of Jesus Christ be with you. May the peace of Jesus Christ find a way to nudge itself into your busy heart. And there may it burst and spread and overtake every fiber and nerve of your being.

Clarification

To all who were disturbed by the poem from my previous post, I apologize. And no, I'm definitely not contemplating suicide, just in case you were wondering.

I guess I didn't think about it quite enough, but the poem was actually meant to be funny. How, you ask? So I had all this stuff about my eulogy and love and Jesus, but then my final and most passionate plea was that I wouldn't be dressed up in a suit and tie! Anywho, it was funny to me.

Oh, and be on the lookout. I think I'm gonna get a haircut soon. You may not recognize me.


Born of Fire

About My Funeral

Here's a poem I'm working on:

About My Funeral

To whomever will care for me
When I die:

Please tell everyone
how much I loved them.

Don't spend too much time
going on about me.
I'm not a great person now,
and I never will be.

Tell them all
about how Christ died for them.
I'll finally have a captive audience.
Use it
to say the things
that I like to say.

And PLEASE,
for GOD's SAKE,
don't dress me up
in one of those stupid monkey suits!
They do not suit me in life,
so I do not expect them to in death.

Remember me
just how I am.

A Little Historical Fiction

I've got a fun little story to tell.

So we all know that when God made Adam and Eve, he told them to be fruitful and multiply. And they had some other tasks too, like tending the garden, naming the animals, etc. But did you know that there was one task he gave them that wasn't recorded in the Bible? Yep.

Originally, God had also appointed them judges on the Earth. He said, "Be fruitful, multiply, and judge all that walketh upon the face of the Earth. Watch all they do, and based on their actions, decide and record whether each one is a good person or a bad person. And you are to determine how much love and affection each one deserves to receive, and mete it out accordingly."

And this all went fine at first. But as people kept following that commandment to multiply, and the population increased, it started to get a little burdensome. They were going through piles and piles of paperwork everyday. Meanwhile, the garden was getting overgrown and unkempt, and new species of animals were forming that they didn't have time to name. It was chaos.

So the overworked couple went to God and told him of their dilemma. And of course, God was very understanding and compassionate. He said, "You guys just go back to the garden, and I'll take care of this judging business." And Adam and Eve were very relieved, and they went back to the garden happy that they no longer had to carry out that wearisome job.